It’s Chinese New Year. The day for new beginning, settling into new years and reflecting on the past year.
For me this reflection has included supporting my family through the loss of a loved one, in person and through meditation.
We had another young family member passed onto the other side this week. He was 33. Super kind, amazing soul. His wife, my cousin, has amazing strength. Her faith and determination to ensure he would get better was unwavering. It really showed no matter what we want for another person, it is their own journey. Others make choices for themselves that no one else can alter no matter how much we support them or love them. Their 8 year old son, has shown me how it is so important to feel and express emotions in the moment that we are present.
I have been reflecting on the last two years and how our family has had the passing of three young individuals, all 32 or 33. My reflection was on my life and on what lessons we can learn from this.
Watching the transition of my those around me has been eye opening. I noticed each person reclaimed their selves back from the grief and sadness in different ways. Some went into victim, others stayed in pain while others threw themselves into a project or took the actions they always wanted to take. Others made decisions that they had been pondering for some time that they knew it would change their lives.
Was any of what each person did wrong? No. They did what their journey required of them at that moment.
The commonality was that all of them irrelevant of what they did, all realized how important it was for them to be happy and healthy. They all took steps in becoming happier or healthier. Many of them also pondered their life purpose and how they were going to live it.
For those who haven’t suffered loss, they do not understand what the person is going through that is moving through the motions and emotions of loss. I wish no one had to go through the pain, anguish, darkness of loss but it is a fact of life.
Those who have not suffered do not understand there will be ups and downs. There will be moments of happiness and sadness and if this lasts for a long period of time then there is a space for concern but in the meantime, allow them to feel what they are feeling.
Unprocessed emotions is the core of all disease. The flowing through emotion allows it to be processed and moved through the body so the individual can be healthier.
Staying in that emotion for an extended time period is unhealthy. This extended time period will vary from 2 minutes to days but it is dependent on where the individual is with their journey.
I have also observed that living your life purpose keeps you here longer on earth. It is so important to support yourself and others to live their life purpose. It gives your life meaning as you are contributing and growing. You will be more satisfied and more fulfilled and also healthier.
The life purpose can be anything from putting a smile on someone’s fade through customer service to changing the way the world lives. It is all life purpose and you contributing to making this world a better place.
Many people are confused about what they really want to do, or they are in a role or a company that is not fulfilling them fully. I urge you (and if your loved one is in that place, support them) to really hone in how you want to contribute in a way that makes you really, really happy. Happy in a way that your heart sings. If you need support, email me and I can send you resources on next steps.
Loss is an eye opener for those who survive. It is an opportunity to reevaluate our own Iife to determine what we need to do to be happier and healthier.
Love and light.